It's beginning to look a lot like Christmas...

A lot of people have been asking... and I just wanted to let you know...

We're doing okay :)

We have felt so blessed this Holiday season. I've never spent a Thanksgiving where I've felt so... deeply thankful for something. This last Thanksgiving (I know... I'm a little late getting to this) was an awesome day for me to reflect on all the blessings in our lives. My husband is alive and well! Not a day goes by that I'm not grateful for that. It has certainly brought a new perspective to our marriage. Getting angry at each other just seems pointless now. Not to say disagreements don't happen anymore but... they're easily resolved now. We have been humbled :)

It has been three months on Tuesday since Ryan was in the hospital. He hasn't been working for three months!! That's 1/4 of a year!!! It has been nice having him around. I guess it wouldn't be any surprise to say we are still working with the "sweet" (totally being sarcastic) woman at Workman's Comp. And we're still slowly going nowhere. Medical Bills are late- which is what I think they aim for.. To drag you along until you're paying 100s of dollars in late fees! I think we'll start a payment plan with the hospital, and hopefully someday in the next 6 months we'll be able to pull something through with Workman's Comp! I'm trying not to get my hopes up. We may not have a solid case. I thought we did. Now I'm not so sure.. I think that's their purpose :)

Sweet little Jayden has been sick the last three months. I'm pretty sure he has asthma and I think I mentioned that before. We have the steroids and the allergy medication but I dont' like how they affect him, and try not to use them very much. He is up for hours at night at least once a week going into coughing fits and throwing up. It breaks my heart. It has been such a blessing to have Ryan home during this time so I'm able to sleep in a little after a long night.

I just finished my two week training. Once again it was a huge blessing to have Ryan home so he could watch Jayden. And to be honest, it was no nice to get out of the house. I think I really needed that. It was also nice to be able to go to bed before three in the morning. But as of today I'm back to my old shift. :( I was able to pick up an extra 20 hours each week so it gave us some extra Christmas cash which was truly a blessing...

Speaking of Christmas. I think this year would have probably been a difficult Christmas. Just because of small stupid things. I swore this year we would have Christmas cards because I always LOVED getting Christmas cards and wanted to send them to loved ones. And I love doing neighbor gifts. We have such a neat neighborhood... so many people helping each other and watching out for each other... And those were things that we would have had to not do this year which would have seriously put me in the dumps...
But... last year I had a feeling I should buy a bunch of small neighbor gifts for this year. Ryan was mad and I remember telling him "Well come 2009... you'll be thanking me for being so prepared" .. I thought I was just BSing... but I wasn't :) I'm sooo grateful I planned ahead. And a year and a half ago I bought 100 stamps. 100 stamps to mail 2 bills. Costco was doing Christmas cards 50 cards and envelopes for only $15!!!! A very talented friend of ours designed a perfect card.. and for 15 dollars I'll be able to send Christmas cards to family! Those are really dumb things... but they were really important to me. I'm so grateful that Heavenly Father provided a way for me to be able to participate in the giving aspect of Christmas. Thank you to our very special friends who also helped provide us with a way to give this year for Christmas. I hope you know who you are! :)

I have joined a lot of websites that email out special deals and promotions. Because of that I was able to buy lots of toys for Jayden for just 30 dollars. I'm glad he's not old enough to care about WHAT he gets or how much its worth. Geez, I hope he's never like that. I think I was a rotten teenager. Sorry mom and dad.

We got family picture done this year. It is going to HAVE to be a tradition- no matter what. When Ryan was in the hospital, and the Dr's were saying he might not make it, or that he might not ever be the same again... A lot of stuff went through my mind. One of them was being so upset that we didn't have a recent family picture. Ryan hates getting his picture taken.. like most guys... But Im so glad we did.

Anyway- I just wanted to sum up that we are doing good. We'll be just fine this Christmas. And we feel the spirit of the season more now than ever before. Which, not to be corny, is the best gift ever.

I have not broken down since everything happened. I thought that one day I would just snap from all the pressure. But I have really felt the spirit strongly in our lives and I don't think there will be a day that I'll just snap. I have been going to Christmas goodies to comfort me from the stresses of daily life. And I need to stop that for the sake of my diabetes and so I dont end up being a contestant on The Biggest Loser ;)
I can see it now: Jillian "WHY ARE YOU FAT?!?!?!" "It all started when my husband almost died..."

So since I'll be up till 3 in the morning working I'll probably be posting pics and videos of the last couple of months. Jayden has been growing up so fast... and they'll all probably be of Jayden. I need to blog every day to keep up on all the new stuff he is learning. ... And that's not gonna happen!

Hopefully I will have time to blog before Christmas, but if not, Merry Christmas!!